It has been a while since our last update, I know. I wanted to start this blog with some blathering about semester's-end busyness and holiday prep. It would have been about half true. Mostly, I've been feeling a little heavy, but I couldn't articulate it well enough to try a blog. The weightiness of my grief and my gratitude seem, still, too much for words. In light of the depth of what I have been thinking and feeling, another post about PT progress (which remains really good) and VIPS visits (also good) refused to materialize when I would sit to write.
But I am emerging again out of that heavy place. So far, I feel like this is healthy - the way the sadness comes and goes like the tide. I do not wish to try to be sad when I'm not, nor try not to feel sad when I do. If I don't muster or deny, maybe I'm emotionally maturing. Maybe. Part of this effort to grow up comes with parenthood - Athan and Morgan need me to learn to model good things for them, including grieving and giving thanks. Often simultaneously. I hope I can do it.
As to the daily stuff: Athan continues to do really well with his physical therapy. We will be recruiting lots of our friends and family in Texas and New Mexico to help us do his "workouts" while we're there for Christmas. Morgan keeps bumping into a world that doesn't bend to her every wish, which keeps surprising her and making her mad. We're doing the best we can to help her navigate the hard work of being a toddler. I am doing what I can to get ready for our trip home for Christmas, and Ryan is diligently finishing his semester up - couple big projects to go.
Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
But I am emerging again out of that heavy place. So far, I feel like this is healthy - the way the sadness comes and goes like the tide. I do not wish to try to be sad when I'm not, nor try not to feel sad when I do. If I don't muster or deny, maybe I'm emotionally maturing. Maybe. Part of this effort to grow up comes with parenthood - Athan and Morgan need me to learn to model good things for them, including grieving and giving thanks. Often simultaneously. I hope I can do it.
As to the daily stuff: Athan continues to do really well with his physical therapy. We will be recruiting lots of our friends and family in Texas and New Mexico to help us do his "workouts" while we're there for Christmas. Morgan keeps bumping into a world that doesn't bend to her every wish, which keeps surprising her and making her mad. We're doing the best we can to help her navigate the hard work of being a toddler. I am doing what I can to get ready for our trip home for Christmas, and Ryan is diligently finishing his semester up - couple big projects to go.
Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
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